Happy Effin Birthday To You

Does anyone else have days like this?

Yesterday was a public holiday. It was an extra public holiday - we celebrated the Queen's birthday twice this year for some unknown reason. I haven't had many public holidays this year due to the fact that nearly all of them are in the first five months of the year when I'm working non-stop so I really wanted to enjoy this one.

Iven wasn't on the same page as me as far as using the holiday well. All he wanted to do was some jobs around the house and veg out a little. I hinted that I wanted to do something. "I'm bored" said extremely loudly counts as a hint doesn't it? But my hint went totally unheeded.

So I hit up the only other person in the house for some company. Yes, Josh said he'd come for a walk/run up Mt Coottha but could he have another hour in bed first. I gave him an hour and a half and filled it with a bit of ironing and mending. And when the hour and a half was up he still wasn't ready to come. I was on my own and I was cranky.

But you can't stay cranky on Mt Coottha. Puffing your way up the stupidly steep Owl Trail doesn't leave enough oxygen for anything except making it to the top. I walked the really steep bits and ran the rest of the way and finished with a 2k downhill feeling like I was king of the mountain.

I got home to find Iven on the roof cleaning out the gutters and immediately switched back to cranky. The only thing that saved him from being a permanent resident on our roof (after I'd hidden away his ladder - I swear I could have tricked the kids into believing we had some mighty big possums on the roof) was a text from Coach Chris. I threatened him with the responsibility of familial bloodshed if he didn't have coffee with me. He was reluctant but decided to save me from years of imprisonment. I don't think cranky would ever be a permissible legal argument in a case of mariticide.

The day was totally topped off by a visit from the neighbour's dog who's been dying to play with Toby for weeks. Molly and Toby play through the fence but that really wasn't enough for Molly. She managed to burrow her way under the fence and came inside to let us know that she was ready to play. Unfortunately she was so excited that she piddled all the way up the hall on our carpet.


And then Sam came home to find a giant spider in his bedroom. Not wanting to wake up with its hairy little legs all over his face, he initiated a family expedition into the unknown (aka under the bed where you don't know if the hairy things are spiders, dust motes or mouldy apple cores.) The safari was successful and the spider would have been mounted and hung on the wall if it hadn't curled up into an insignificant ball - making Sam's claims of 'biggest spider ever' and 'megafauna' seem like a huge exaggeration.

Seriously, if you're listening, oh mighty Queen. Can you just stick to one birthday next year?