Fashion Phobia

I've decided that I'm a little odd. How can it be that I can front up week after week to train till my heart rate is through the roof and I'm red and pouring with sweat? Putting my self on the line like that doesn't phase me at all. But ask me to do something that most women love and I turn into a panicky mess.

A couple of posts ago I mentioned how my youngest sister was getting married. I'm really happy for her and Brad. And I'm excited about the wedding ... all except for one thing. That little thing that I'm dreading is (cue ominous music) finding something to wear.

Seriously, I HATE shopping for clothes. I hate looking through racks of dresses, skirts, blouses, whatever and trying to find something that suits me and is age-appropriate. And don't get me started about shoes! I am no Imelda Marcos - except when it comes to my runners. My best shoes are the ones I got married in almost 25 years ago!

When I go shopping all my insecurities come to the fore. I have four sisters and three of the four love to dress up, love to wear make-up and love being the centre of attention. I feel like the ugly step-sister in amongst them. I was the shy, bookish one who paid more attention to going for goals than looking good. It's just who I am and I'm comfortable with myself nearly all the time - except when I'm put in these artificial situations.

And not only do I have to find something for the wedding but Lucy and Brad have also decided to throw in an engagement party and I'll have to find something for that too. I'm wishing for a fashionista fairy godmother who will just wave her magic wand and clothe me so I look gorgeous. I could always buck traditional expectation and wear what I'm comfortable in - a sequinned technical singlet, running skirt (leopard print, of course) and my cleanest runners.

The Week After the Marathon

This week has been strange. It's so weird to go from running 70k weeks to not running at all. But I've got to admit that it hasn't been too hard lying in bed till 6:30 every morning.

I've had a lot of time to reflect over the whole marathon thing this week and what I've realised is that I have the most amazing and supportive people in my life. From my husband who came along for a weekend in Melbourne but just had to do what I wanted (because it was all about me). To my boys who never questioned what I was doing and all sent messages that said how proud they were of me. To my running friends who got nervous for me and sent texts of support both before and after the run. To my non-running friends who sent weather updates and gave me a painful post-race massage. And then there were all my bloggy friends. How amazing is it to get messages from all over the world?!! I would never have believed that reaching a personal goal could become such a community event.

I've also had time to reflect on where I was a year ago. I was at a point where I could hardly run more than a kilometer without becoming exhausted. My heart rate was through the roof and some days I just had to lie down on my workroom floor and rest to get through the day. Now I can run for hours and, yes, my heart rate is pretty up there but I think that's only to be expected.

What really brought all this to the fore was a conversation I had with one of the assistants at my supermarket. She asked about my running and I told her about Melbourne then she went on to say how much improvement she'd noticed in me through the year. She could see it in my face and my general demeanor how much I'd been struggling at the beginning of the year but now I was full of life and happy. Wow - I didn't realise how easy I was to read.

So where to next? I'm taking it easy for the rest of this 4-week cycle then I'll be building up to do the Kurrawa to Duranbah run in early December. It's a 25k run along the coast line and, even though it's pretty hot, the views are just amazing. Then (and I'm saying this in my tiniest voice so no one really hears yet) maybe I'll think about doing the marathon in Canberra.

And finally - joy of joys - I have my washer working again!! I've got to be one of the happiest women in Australia today.

PS - the picture is of one of the leotards that I made for the Commonwealth Games. Dani and her team mates won gold in the team event.

First of all I would like to say I have the most enormous respect for anyone who does a marathon and even more respect for anyone who does more than one.

I flew down to Melbourne on Saturday. I don't know if I've said this before, but I can be a terrible flier. I carry Valium whenever I fly as a security blanket but Saturday I managed the trip without too much angst. I can't ever eat before flying which was a bit of an issue but I figured I'd try and make up for it during the day. We checked into our hotel then I took Iven for a tram ride to the market and it's the tram ride where my nerves really started to kick in. I saw the MCG (where we were starting and finishing) and felt instantly sick. I had to mentally slap myself around the head and try to think of something else. Needless to say I couldn't eat much for lunch. Not the best the day before a big run.

We met the group for dinner (I nearly chickened out cause I was worried about being sick) and had a lovely evening. I managed to eat! We went back to our room and I tried to get some sleep.

It was a really early start on Sunday. I had to meet Coach Chris and our marathoners in the lobby of the motel at 5:20 (which is 4:20 Queensland time) I'd managed to squash a banana and some bread with honey down my throat but it wasn't sitting too well. The nerves had kicked into over-drive. I couldn't talk because I was afraid if I opened my mouth up semi-digested food would come out. I was thinking longingly of the Valium but new it probably wasn't a performance-enhancing drug. Iven knew by my silence that I was a mess. He held on tight to my hand and gave me moral support which is all he can do when I'm in that state. We walked over to the starting area and were about 40 mins early but I couldn't just relax. I had to keep walking up and down. Iven took this lovely picture of me just after I'd been dry-reaching.



All too soon it was time to start. I joined the runners behind the start line and miraculously the nerves disappeared.



The gun went off and so did we ... after a short delay. I settled into a nice comfortable tempo and kept saying to myself to relax and conserve energy. The first couple of k were slow but there was a bit of traffic and I didn't want to do the dodge and weave thing but by the 3rd k I was at the pace I wanted to run and it felt comfortable. I ran into a couple from our group and ran with them for a while but lost them at a water stop so then it was just me and my music and about 6000 strangers all heading in the same direction.

The k's ticked over and I tried to keep my mind distracted and enjoy what was happening around me. I made sure I took my gel around 10 or 11 k and I was taking water every second station. We ran down to St Kilda and turned right along the Esplanade then looped back and ran past our entry point then back up where we'd come in. This meant that the field looped back on itself twice and I got a chance to look out for the Galeforce Squad members. That was fun and a great distraction. We cheered on each other whenever we passed and it gave me a big lift. I'd had another gel about 21k and was still travelling well.

We turned off the Esplanade and headed back into the City at around 29k and I was hitting my 5:30's or under. At 33k I had a third gel and some water and I think this was where I started to unravel. I got to a turn in the road and came to a sudden standstill. I needed a toilet NOW! I didn't know if I was going to have the runs or throw up and I felt just dreadful. It was right near a big car park and there was a parking attendant watching so I asked him if there was a toilet nearby. Yay, there was, down into the carpark and then take a right. I trotted where he'd told me and found myself in the dimly-lit foyer of an Arts Centre. Someone was playing a violin somewhere and there were mirrors everywhere showing me just how dreadful I look after almost three hours of running. I don't know if it was because I was oxygen-deprived or if I was just tired, but I couldn't seem to find where the toilet was. After what seemed like ages I found someone who pointed me in the right direction. Relief! But then I had to find my way out and I kept walking into dead-ends until I saw the sign pointing to the carpark. Doh!

Back onto the course I was optimistic that not too much damage had been done to my hopes of coming in under 4 hours but I didn't realise that the nausea that had forced me to stop was going to keep coming back. I had to stop and walk every so often. But thankfully the kilometer markers kept coming, albeit a bit slower and I knew that the MCG was getting closer and that soon I would see my cheer squad.

I ran past the 41k marker and heard my name. It was Kylie from my squad. She tucked in and ran alongside me for a little way. Rounding a bend I heard Steve, another squad member. And then there was Iven, Mum, Dad and Jack. I beamed at them and asked jokingly if I could stop now. The finish line was so close. It was just round the bend, under a bridge, through a tunnel then onto the hallowed turf of the MCG (Melbourne Cricket Ground). We had nearly a lap of the oval to run then it was through the finish arch. Done!

I got my medal and some water and made my way up to where Iven was going to be waiting. The Geraghty's, from our running group were with Iven and daughter Clare was holding a trophy. She'd won the half marathon! I'm the giant in the pic.



They took a pic of Iven and I and I must say that I'm looking mighty relieved to be finished.

So that's how it went. Will I ever do it again? It's too soon to say. I feel like I've got unfinished business but I have to learn to control my nerves and my stomach. And even though I was a bit disappointed with the time, I've decided that wandering around an arts centre lost in the middle of the race makes for a much more interesting race story.

I Am A Marathoner.

Just a really quick post tonight. I am a marathoner! And I have the medal to prove it. The time wasn't what I was quite hoping for but I did make my primary goal of finishing in an upright position. The time? 4:06:50 (unofficially from my own timing) the event? Well organized. The weather? Almost perfect. I've been a little disappointed this afternoon because of the time and because my stomach let me down. But when I think of all the times (and there were many in the past few months) where I almost changed events, I'm really happy that I went through with it. And I've been so touched by all the support I've received. I'll post a full race report when I get back to my computer.

Waiting ...

It's so close now - so close and still yet so far. The waiting is so frustrating. Today I've been wishing that I was already in Melbourne enjoying myself and the great coffee/food that they have there. But the whole reason that I didn't book to travel today is so I wouldn't spend the day walking around and getting tired legs like I did last time I was down there to race.

I've just had a visit from the washing-machine repair guy. Last Thursday (8 whole days ago) our 4 year old washer decided to have a sit-down strike. Having no washer with a family of 5 is NOT convenient. Luckily my Mum lives only a little way away and was happy to let me use hers. Anyway the repairman pulled the thing apart and told me that he needs some parts and they will take A WEEK to get here. Seriously?!!! A week to get from Adelaide to Brisbane. If they put them on a plane they could be here in about 4 hours. The good news is that we have an extended warranty and if the machine can't be fixed we get a new one! The bad news is that I will be spending a lot of next week over at Mum's waiting for the machine to finish. I'm not a patient person and I'm not good at waiting.

I'm off to pack now. See you all on the other side!

A Mild Case of Taper Madness

Four days to go! I'm still in a pretty good state of mind but I've had a couple of moments of hypochondria/taper madness (which is normal isn't it?) My symptoms? A very slight dry scratchiness in my throat - I haven't had a cold in I don't know how long so it would be inevitable that one arrives just before my debut marathon. But logically I think this is due to minor spring-time allergies. I have the itchy eyes and I think it's the sneezing that's making my throat a bit scratchy. And the throat hasn't gotten any worse.

My other symptom is a twingey hamstring. I've been stretching it and rolling it out but every time I finish running I feel it. The good thing is that I don't feel it while I'm running and it's been twingey for a couple of months now so I'm going to continue to bury my head in the sand about that one and ignore it. I'll deal with it after the big day.

These last few days in the lead-up have been great. Our running group is just buzzing with excitement. With so many of us going down, there's a real camaraderie happening. The team spirit has been helped by having team singlets done and they look great!



I've had text messages, breakfasts and coffees with different friends who all wanted wish me the best and who are excited for me. Not one of these people think I'm having a psychotic episode or a temporary break with reality. I have some awesome friends!

The last sign of taper madness that I've had is an uncontrollable urge to tell strangers that I'm running a marathon this weekend. Silly, I know but because the urge IS uncontrollable, I've decided to just go with it - even make a game of it. I'm now counting up how many people I've told gratuitously. So far I'm up to six. (you've got to remember that I don't actually have contact with that many people every day) I'm gunning for double-digits by the end of the week.

Happy News

I had the most awesome news yesterday. My baby sister is going to get married!! Lucy has had a tough few years. Her first marriage broke down and it was quite a bitter divorce (on his side). She has two daughters and has been a great Mum to them through it all. Last year she met Brad - actually she became reacquainted with him as they'd previously worked at the same place - and she hasn't looked back. He's just lovely and they're so happy together and we're going to have a wedding!

She's tentatively asked if I'd like to do cupcakes as the wedding cake (she has to get Brad's approval first). I'm so honoured (or will be if Brad gives his approval) So there may be a lot of practicing of cupcake baking and icing in my near future. They've set the date for December this year! If I'm doing the cakes I hope the weather is kind.

It's down to 6 days on the countdown to Melbourne. I'm still feeling good. I've been able to check the weather forecast finally and it's looking like it'll be perfect running weather. It's supposed to be fine with a min of 9C (48F) and a max of 20C (68F) The last time I ran in Melbourne it was quite warm and really windy. This will be so much better.

Saturday was my last long run - of 12k. I ran with some of the boys and we were really pushing along in the last couple of k. It felt so good! I felt strong, and I haven't felt like that in such a long time. When we got back, Andrew (who's doing Melbourne too) said we were running at Marathon pace and I almost freaked out. I told him that I wouldn't be running that hard for 42.2k. What he'd meant was that for 3/4 of the run we had run at Marathon pace and I'd thought he'd meant the last little bit when we ran sub-5:00.

I'm still not sure what pace to go out at. I'm thinking that I should start around 5:25ish for the first few k then see how I'm holding out and adjust accordingly. A lot of my friends who are recent marathoners have just run to where they're comfortable and that sounds like a good plan. I'm so glad that I've got plenty to keep me busy and distracted this week. That way I won't be able to over-think!