Missing A 'First'

This is the first time in my life that I've missed one of the 'firsts' of my eldest son.

I was there when he took his first breath. When he first rolled over. When he took his first steps. When he went to kindy for the first time. First day at school. At High School. University. 

It's a pretty long list now that he's 26, so it's about time I missed one of those firsts. And I didn't feel sad about not being there. Not terribly sad. Just a little wistful that I didn't get to send him on his way with a "Have a good day." And I wouldn't be able to know just by looking if he was nervous - because a mother can just tell these things. 

Today would mark the first of many firsts to come where I won't actually be there in body - only in spirit.

So how lovely was it to get this picture from his girlfriend, Hannah, who'd made him pose (reluctantly) for the "obligatory first day of 'school' photo"?

Sam, you've picked a winner there! A girl with a kind and loving heart.

The 'first day of school' comment took me back to his first week of school, 21 years ago. My first-born going to school was a pretty big deal and I'd been a little unprepared for my baby interacting with older, more worldly children. Within a couple of days he'd come home and proudly announced that he'd learnt which finger was the rude one. And a day or so later he'd asked me if he was a 'poofer' (poofter).

So I sent him this good luck text.

Hope you have a good first day at work. And that the big kids play nice with you. If any of them ask if you know what the rude finger is I give you permission to show them (unless the asker is your boss). And if you're asked if you're a 'poofer' just show them a pic of Hannah.

I didn't feel like I'd missed out on his first any more.