Saturday, July 10, 2010

Yesterday I was in a whole world of shame. I had to endure the most humiliating experience - emptying out my entire kitchen with my mother. Don't get me wrong - I don't keep my pornography collection or my illicit drug supply in my kitchen cupboards. It's just the usual stuff. Food, pots, pans, electrical equipment, cutlery and crockery. Things that shouldn't bring me shame. The shame was the state that those cupboards were in.

I am not big on spring cleaning. Occasionally I'm moved to clean the odd cupboard, but I will stress the word occasionally. I've probably managed a good deep clean maybe four or five times since we've been in this house and we're coming up to 24 years here. So you can pretty much guess the condition that my cupboards were in. I started on the high cupboards because Mum is a little height-challenged. Mum started in the pantry. I'm sure she was secretly horrified about how many products were out of date. I think the most out of date thing was 5 years. (Ooops!!) But she restrained herself from gasping out loud or breaking down sobbing at where she'd gone wrong as a mother. She just discreetly pulled out a garbage bag and started tossing stuff. It'll make filling up our new pantry a lot easier.

When she finished the pantry she moved on to the pots and pans and discovered that I'm anti-cockroach-spraying. She managed to fill half a dustpan with bits and pieces from many dead roaches - a few wings, lots of legs and sometimes entire corpses that had died peacefully of old age.

It took about 4 hours but our kitchen is now empty and ready to be dismantled tomorrow. The oven is currently cooking its last ever batch of cookies and brownies and next week I'll be cooking in a shiny new one and washing our plates in our first-ever dishwasher.

Our lounge room has been temporarily converted into an open-plan pantry. It will be an interesting and creative week of food preparation. But I'm up to the challenge - and to make it all the more interesting this week marks week one of marathon training. Will I come out of all of this with my sanity? Keep watching this space.


  1. Sounds like you're getting a new kitchen! That is exciting!

    My mother is a meticulously neat person. I know she is horrified every time she visits and that is AFTER I have rushed to clean up everything before she arrives.

  2. Sounds like it will be an interesting week, but I'm sure it will all be worth it once the new and improved kitchen is finished!

  3. I'm sure your mom was thrilled to help!

  4. You're going to feel so great when the kitchen project is complete! WTG!
    Hell would freeze over before my mom would ever help me clean.

  5. When I was in the Coast Guard I lived in a flat alone for 14 months, you cannot imagine how my kitchen was when I left the La Maddalena Naval Base to come back to my Harbour Master Department.
    And I thought to be a good "house-man".

  6. The process of getting a new kitchen is a big 'ole pain! But well worth it in the end.

    BTW--I am heading "down under" in August, but to Sydney. I see you are in Brisbane--a shame b/c we could have hooked up!

  7. Hey Char--It's Aug. 10-24, so unfortunately I'll be gone by the time you get there! Can't wait to check out your country though!

  8. Just caught up on your weekend race report(s)! I'm sure I've said this before, but you are speedy! Good job on your races :)'s quite a special feeling being a medical oddity...NOT :)

  9. My mom came for a visit recently, I spent the TWO weeks prior to her visit furiously cleaning and organizing and yet the day she came in she went straight to my cabinets and started washing down the front of them. *sigh*


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