Sunday, April 21, 2013

You Can't Keep a Good Man Down

Apparently my husband must be a good man because I'm having trouble keeping him down.

The problem is that he's not sick, just injured. And in his injured state it's quite easy to see all the jobs that need doing around the house and be a bit frustrated that he can't get to them. After all he has a couple of weeks off work (because he is injured from trying to do jobs around the house - the irony seems to escape him).

But rather than suffer through the frustration and just let them stay undone, he's been trying to tackle them one-handed. And this terrifies me because he managed to damage himself enough to require surgery when he had two good hands.

Last Friday I was working away downstairs when I heard a loud banging come from above. A loud banging over my head is not a usual occurrence so I HAD to go investigate. I found Iven sitting on the top step of our patio with a hammer and chisel trying to chip out a cracked tile. And yes, he was using his recently-sewn-up-still-in-a-cast hand to stabilise the chisel while he hits it with the hammer in his left hand. He is not left handed. He is not ambidextrous. He IS an accident waiting to happen.

Then Saturday he decided that he should try to finish the job that started all this drama. He's trying to move a gate at the side of our house to have easier access to a shed where the boys are supposed to store their bikes but don't because they have to open a gate. The gate was welded to a post and he was using the angle grinder to cut it off. This week the angle grinder is definitely verboten so he tried the hacksaw instead. But the hacksaw wasn't working so well so he ended up with a crowbar. Yes, it's absolutely a great idea to use a crowbar one handed with only your leg to help stabilise it.

Sunday, having been successful with removing the gate, it was time to weld something to something (I think it was hinge to a post but not exactly sure because my policy now is to stick my head in the sand and hope that it will all go away). Starting to freak out about a one-handed man in charge of what could be considered a flame thrower. Thank heavens #3 son, Luke decided that it was a good day to learn how to weld.

Luke, I am your Father. Now give me my mask back.

Is it any wonder that I have a packet of Valium in my bedside table?
Is it any wonder that I have the emergency number programmed into speed dial?
Is it any wonder that I run as much as I do?

Even Toby is feeling the stress. Some of you commented on Toby's cone of shame in his last photo. He's been chewing on his leg and I swear it's because he's worried about Iven. Or it could be that he doesn't want Iven to get all the attention.

I've just been reading up on tendon repairs and basically it takes about six weeks to heal. And you're not supposed to do anything with the affected area until you have your surgeon's okay. And 2 out of 50 surgeries end up with complications because the patient DOESN'T DO WHAT THEY'RE TOLD. I'm now taking bets on whether Iven will be one of that 4%. But the odds are really short.

I haven't spent the whole weekend just following around Iven with a first aid kit and popping tranquillizers. I've also done lots of fun stuff. Like doing a couple of loads of washing. Like killing an ant colony that was trying to take over our house one cupboard at a time. Like cutting the hair that grows between the pads on Toby's paws which make him slip all over the kitchen tiles. Like sorting out all the books under my bed into 'read' and 'unread' piles and then trying to find spaces in our bookshelves for the 'read' ones.

I also finally got around to writing things into my diary - important things like races, hen's nights, weddings and 50th birthday parties. And that's when I realised that my system of not writing things into my diary and assuming that I was free every weekend just didn't work so well. It usually works fine because I basically have no social life apart from running, races and breakfasts with running friends. And last year, because I was too unwell to do many events it mattered even less. Now I'm feeling a lot better and running a lot better I've let my hair down a bit and entered quite a few races - including one in Sydney in May on just the weekend of my BIL's 50th birthday party. The same party that I'd bought the gorgeous (and fairly expensive) dress for last weekend. Oops.

And while I'm sorry that I won't be able to celebrate a significant event in Mike's life, I'm a tiny bit devastated that I don't get to wear the gorgeous dress - at least for a little while. So I did what any good blogger would do. I got all dressed up (with no place to go) just so my dress could have a virtual outing. (Note the strapping tape around my ankles - it's what every stylish runner is wearing this season).

The silver lining is that I now have enough dresses to wear a different one for each of my sons' weddings. All I have to do is convince them to get married just so I can wear them.


  1. Great dress. You are a long-suffering wife and mother, with such a clumsy husband and sons who refuse to hurry up and get married! Hope you can talk some sense into all of them.

  2. You look great Char, strapping tape and all!

  3. Gorgeous dress - no matter when you finally have an occasion to wear it!!
    Reading about your injured husband trying to tackle projects made me laugh!! I really hope he doesn't cause further injury, though! Good luck with that!

  4. Great picture of you :)
    I hope your injured husband will be more careful. Anyway, running as much as you do is better than getting valium :)

  5. Hmmm. Getting married so you can wear your dresses? New reason to encourage marriage! I would be going crazy with Iven but I can tell you my husband would be doing the exact same thing.

    And I bet Toby is stressed over all the changes.

  6. You look great in the pic - strapping tape and all. Iven sounds like my uncle (who isn't well) but loves keeping busy. I hate asking for favours but know he LOVES doing stuff around the house. Every time I drive past their place he's outside doing something.

    Some people just can't sit still. I am - however - an expert (well, at being horizontal!)

  7. We were joking (maybe we were very serious) this weekend of how we wish the children will leave the house sooner than later to give us a peaceful weekend... Anette said they just need to give her enough time to get a dress :) Hoping Iven behaves and will heal completely. Our dog ate his cone in the end and we had to get an even bigger one for him.

  8. I love that look great! You must find an occasion :) Iven sounds like a lot of men I know...invincible! ;)

    BTW I went and voted for you!! Go Char!!

  9. Great dress - and accessories. No wonder you need to train all the time. I'd be in the peak of fitness too with all that action in the house. Good luck with your boys - and Iven!

  10. beautiful dress! and yes...can't keep a good man bff and i always say "men, can't live with 'em, can't live without 'em!!!" :)

  11. Wow, your stat on tendon repairs is crazy! I can see how it would be easy to overdo it.

    It's always sad but just a little funny when our dog has to wear the Cone Of Shame. His bumping into walls is sad but just a little funny. Hope your gang gets well soon!

  12. Iven ..... stop it behave and let the hand fix itself.
    Toby .... stop it, the cone of shame is not a good look!
    Char ..... gorgeous dress, you wear it well.

  13. Love the dress! And I know you will find somewhere spectacular to wear it!

    We had a lab who also chewed on his own leg. Vet prescribed Prozac (back in the '90s) and when I had to pick it up at the regular pharmacy, the pharmacist instructed me I couldn't let my child be out in the sun too much on this medication. When I said he was a dog, the pharmacist laughed and said how relieved he was that I hadn't named my child Elvis. :)

  14. Oh no I hope Iven doesn't jeopardize his recovery! You look stunning! I need Toby's cone as one of our dogs is scratching a hole in his back. Must be something in the air. Oy.

  15. Fabulous dress, and you look amazing. Wear it every chance you get that you deem to be special enough, I say! As for the injured husband still attempting to do his household sympathy. Just awe and wonder. I have a fully functioning husband whose super power is his ability to completely ignore and block out all household maintenance.

  16. You look great in that dress! I really like it.

  17. Beautiful dress. I hope that husband behaves and will be careful. My wife, as you, has always ready the emergency number because of my many incidents (injures). The last time I felt she said crying: "you are stupid, stupid, stupid" and the real problem is that she is right!


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