Separations

Blahhh! What an ordinary week it's been. Actually the entire week hasn't been bad - just from Wednesday on.

Wednesday I got a phone call from my sister. She and I have been in partnership for the last 18 years in our sportswear business but over the last 5 years things have changed. She and her husband bought a cafe and gradually she's stepped away from our business and become increasingly involved with the cafe. Over the past 18 months things have gone badly for the cafe and in her personal life to the point where she's now separated from her husband and on the verge of losing the cafe and her house. He's left the state and she's had to soldier on and try to hold everything together.

Wednesday she told me that she can't work with me anymore. I knew that this day would eventually come but I'm still hurt and angry. I think it hurts more when it comes from family and especially when you've been supportive and understanding all the way through. I know I'll cope with whatever comes along but for now I just want to be a little self-indulgently sorry for myself.

The hard thing is that although I'm furious with her and feel let-down and used, I still feel sorry for her. And I have to be so careful in my actions because, when all is said and done, she's my sister and I still want a relationship with her. So for the moment I'm just licking my wounds in private.

I've been feeling so bad that I'm not sure if I can run on Sunday. I'm not ruling it out altogether - I'm just going to see how I feel on the day. I talked to one of my running friends yesterday and she told me to give myself a week or two to just be kind to myself and process it all. Sage advice that I'm going to take.